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<!-- heading in pencil --> <head>27 March 1802<lb/>Compensation</head> <p><add>there is not</add> a character more repugnant to <add>it could be more <unclear>reticent</unclear> to me to wear/bear</add> my feeling than that<lb/>of <unclear>eating</unclear> much and deserving <add>earning</add> little.</p><p>Though for <del><sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic> Pitt's lost place</del> <add>the Grand Declaimer's <del>last</del> forfeited Exhibition</add> I <del>would</del> <add>could</add> not condemn<lb/>myself to <del>put on</del> <add>wear</add> his schoolboy haughtiness —<lb/><add>Your Lordship has perhaps perceived —<lb/>though whatever be my pride</add><lb/>I am not without my pride <del>though my inferiors</del> <add>those who have need of me</add><lb/>see <add>feel</add> no signs of it.<hi rend="superscript">[+]</hi> <note><hi rend="superscript">[+]</hi> Though my Convicts<lb/> if I had them would<lb/>be treated with more kindness<lb/><del>by</del> and answered with<lb/>more punctuality than<lb/><sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic> Long ever had <add>found</add> for<lb/>me or <sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic> Pitt for<lb/>— Lord of the<lb/><gap/>) a Duke when<lb/><add><gap/> or a County<lb/>Member whom</add><lb/>he thought he could<lb/>scorn with safety</note></p> <p><note>Though throughout<lb/>a seven year experience<lb/>of shuffling and provocation<lb/><add>and</add> of fraud and perfidy<lb/>and all those <add>ultimately</add> <unclear>incontestable</unclear><lb/>by which <unclear>was</unclear> power<lb/>rendered despicable<lb/>travel <add>could preserve</add> a trip<lb/>without a single<lb/><add>keep on paying without<lb/>a single default, that<lb/>to that of respect which</add><lb/> <del>instance of departure<lb/>either the</del> so many the<lb/>perquisites of office annexed<lb/><add>to that of respect due</add><lb/>attached<lb/>to office — <del>suffering<lb/>Honourable gentlemen</del><lb/>to not unwilling at the<lb/>same time that Honourable<lb/>Gentlemen should<lb/> <add>understand</add> see it was to office they<lb/>were indebted for it</note></p><p>Notwithstanding all this, now I — <add>obscure</add> oppressed — <del>deserte</del><lb/><add>impoverished neglected deserted as I am now I Your Lordship<lb/>may have experienced — am not without my pride: and</add><lb/>born low indeed <add>and degraded</add> I must have sunk in my own eyes — <add>I must <del>be in my own eyes — <gap/></del></add> before<lb/>I could <sic>submitt</sic> to <unclear>revile</unclear> myself <del>with</del> in the same<lb/>class or species of men — <del>as</del> <add>or to be confounded in the estimate of whose who know me</add> — a <sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic> Rose, a <sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic><lb/>Long, a <sic>M<hi rend="superscript">r</hi></sic> Baldwin or a Duke of Portland</p> <p>What the <sic>Portugueze</sic> was to <unclear>Mmlesquinas</unclear> Spaniard<lb/>men like these. My Lord, are to me: —<lb/><hi rend="underline">Solitude obscurity poverty</hi> — "<hi rend="underline">"every thing is <unclear>acceptable</unclear><lb/>"to me that <add>seems to</add> distinguish me from you".</hi></p> <p>Thus then stands the matter about compensation —<lb/>was it possible we should agree? A sham compensation<lb/>I would not have — a real one they could not<lb/>give me if they would: but they never would have<lb/>given me so much as a sham one.</p> <p>A <sic>burthen</sic> to my country I would not <add>to</add> be made<lb/><!-- brackets in pencil -->[I told them so from the first.] But their only expedient<lb/>for <sic>disburthening</sic> themselves from shame was by <add>the</add> making<lb/>me a <sic>burthen</sic> to the country — such a <sic>burthen</sic> as<lb/>themselves.</p> | |||
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27 March 1802
Compensation
there is not a character more repugnant to it could be more reticent to me to wear/bear my feeling than that
of eating much and deserving earning little.
Though for Mr Pitt's lost place the Grand Declaimer's last forfeited Exhibition I would could not condemn
myself to put on wear his schoolboy haughtiness —
Your Lordship has perhaps perceived —
though whatever be my pride
I am not without my pride though my inferiors those who have need of me
see feel no signs of it.[+] [+] Though my Convicts
if I had them would
be treated with more kindness
by and answered with
more punctuality than
Mr Long ever had found for
me or Mr Pitt for
— Lord of the
) a Duke when
or a County
Member whom
he thought he could
scorn with safety
Though throughout
a seven year experience
of shuffling and provocation
and of fraud and perfidy
and all those ultimately incontestable
by which was power
rendered despicable
travel could preserve a trip
without a single
keep on paying without
a single default, that
to that of respect which
instance of departure
either the so many the
perquisites of office annexed
to that of respect due
attached
to office — suffering
Honourable gentlemen
to not unwilling at the
same time that Honourable
Gentlemen should
understand see it was to office they
were indebted for it
Notwithstanding all this, now I — obscure oppressed — deserte
impoverished neglected deserted as I am now I Your Lordship
may have experienced — am not without my pride: and
born low indeed and degraded I must have sunk in my own eyes — I must be in my own eyes — before
I could submitt to revile myself with in the same
class or species of men — as or to be confounded in the estimate of whose who know me — a Mr Rose, a Mr
Long, a Mr Baldwin or a Duke of Portland
What the Portugueze was to Mmlesquinas Spaniard
men like these. My Lord, are to me: —
Solitude obscurity poverty — ""every thing is acceptable
"to me that seems to distinguish me from you".
Thus then stands the matter about compensation —
was it possible we should agree? A sham compensation
I would not have — a real one they could not
give me if they would: but they never would have
given me so much as a sham one.
A burthen to my country I would not to be made
[I told them so from the first.] But their only expedient
for disburthening themselves from shame was by the making
me a burthen to the country — such a burthen as
themselves.
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Identifier: | JB/121/331/001"JB/" can not be assigned to a declared number type with value 121. |
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1802-03-27 |
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121 |
Panopticon |
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331 |
Compensation |
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001 |
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Text sheet |
1 |
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Recto"Recto" is not in the list (recto, verso) of allowed values for the "Rectoverso" property. |
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1800 |
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1800 |
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001 |
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